Remembering last year...

Tonight as Bruce and I rewatched some video clips we found, reporting on last January's earthquake in Haiti, we ran into this one. Ali is one of the amazing McMutrie sisters who we are forever indebted to for our children's safety. She is speaking from the Children's Hospital in Pittsburgh where our children arrived...and where we were allowed to finally take them home. Nearly a year since that time, we SO wish we could personally thank these ladies, who are hard at work back in Haiti with 8 new orphans. However, this time, they have worked hard to provide work for women, provide formula to new mothers, and to keep 30 families together. Pray for their strength and continued miracles!

The right verse at the right time

As our love for Pierre and Ange-Laurette grows with each day...so does the list of activities on the calendar, the number of typical squabbles with 4 kids in the house, and the hours of homework that is so much tougher for them. It is so good to just sit and read through past journal entries to remember what a miracle they are and how much we prayed for this new "normalcy."

We had a new adoptive parent we met say that adoption is not "all fun and bliss" and should be considered over a long time and through much prayer. But we also know that God plants seeds over a long period of time for some of us adoptive parents...and that he watches closely to see if we are willing to just simply "obey" when called. That is more our story. That has added lots of "education" along the road since we did not do all the preliminary research...but it laid the absolutely critical foundation of FAITH and LOVE that has helped us endure the trials.

Each time I am needing just one word of advice, his Word is there. Today, this well-known verse pulled through:

"Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
1 Cor. 13:7

Humbled to be recognized

(from Stephanie Herseth Sandlin's website...a friend found this when she "googled" my name :) We also want to personally thank Congresswoman Herseth Sandlin for taking time out of a hectic campaign to invite our family for an ice cream cone to celebrate this nomination, and just for her to check in on the kids. What a genuinely, caring person...and fun conversations!

HERSETH SANDLIN NOMINATES BRUCE AND JILL LEAR OF WATERTOWN AS ANGELS IN ADOPTION


Washington, DC (October 1, 2010) – Today, U.S. Representative Stephanie Herseth Sandlin announced she has nominated Bruce and Jill Lear of Watertown as 2010 Angels in Adoption. The Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute (CCAI), which orchestrates the Angels in Adoption program, will honor 140 Angels at an awards ceremony and gala event in Washington, DC, October 6, 2010.

As a member of the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute (CCAI), Rep. Herseth Sandlin nominated the Lear’s for recognition as part of CCAI’s Angels in Adoption program. This program allows for Members of Congress to “honor the good work of constituents who have enriched the lives of foster children and orphans.”

“I am so pleased that Bruce and Jill Lear were able to bring their adoptive children, Pierre and Ange-Laurette, to the U.S. after the tragic earthquake that struck Haiti,” said Rep. Herseth Sandlin.

Two days after the earthquake in Haiti on January 14, 2010, Jill and Bruce Lear contacted Rep. Herseth Sandlin for assistance in securing temporary visas for their two adoptive children, Pierre and Ange-Laurette. The children’s orphanage was badly damaged during the earthquake, as was the building that processed adoptions.

Rep. Herseth Sandlin and Senators Johnson and Thune worked with the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) to assist the Lears in bringing their son and daughter from Haiti and to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, where Bruce and Jill Lear joined them.

The Angels in Adoption program is CCAI’s signature public awareness campaign and provides an opportunity for all members of the U.S. Congress to honor the good work of their constituents who have enriched the lives of foster children and orphans in the United States and abroad. “The Angels in Adoption program is unlike any other program in the Nation’s Capital. Because of it, over 1700 “Angels’ have come to share with Washington their adoption experience and left with a renewed excitement of all that adoption makes possible,” said Kathleen Strottman, Executive Director of the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute.

CCAI is a nonprofit organization dedicated to raising awareness about foster children in the U.S. and the millions of orphans around the world in need of permanent, safe, and loving homes. CCAI’s goal is to eliminate the barriers that hinder these children from realizing their basic right to a family.

Still more firsts!

I will never get over the joys of experiencing things for the first time with these kids. The trees changing colors and then dropping leaves to the ground...the high school homecoming game with everyone dressed in purple and gold and balloons released...the parade with painted vans with roofs cut off and full of high schoolers...









...dressing up in costumes to go door to door for bags of candy...and (even on Halloween) orange lights lining the roofs of houses! Pierre said, "Mom, Halloween is beautiful!" Just wait until Christmas! They can't seem to get enough and always appreciate the newness of each holiday.

Life Light Concert

We took the kids and my nieces to the annual LifeLight Christian Concert south of Sioux Falls, SD. We hadn't been to the concert since 2008...the weekend that we decided to sponsor a child online (which resulted in this BIGGER step :). During an intermission from the bands, the speaker showed video of orphans in Ethiopia. He shared that sponsoring them with monthly contributions could truly change lives. Then he asked all 100,000 of us to join hands and pray for these children. As Ange-Laurette held my hand up high with hers, I was almost in tears. Afterward, I asked her, "Did you know that this is the place that we first started on this adoption journey? Haven't you heard us tell how we went online to sponsor a child?" She asked what sponsoring meant. I said that families could send money to the orphanage each month for a certain child while they waited to be adopted. Then I went on to explain in detail how we saw this face on the computer screen that led us to decide to adopt instead. I said, "Do you know whose face that was? YOURS!" (You have to know Ange-Laurette to appreciate her response.) She lightly hit me on the arm and said, "Mom! You should have sent me the money!" We roared with laughter.


That next day in school, the kids all shared what they did fun over their Labor Day weekend. Pierre proudly shared that he got to go to a Justin Bieber concert. The kids were amazed! I explained that actually it was a Christian concert, but not Justin Bieber. Pierre said matter-of-factly, "Oh well. Same thing." :)

"Ange-Laurette is sure aging!"

Bruce thought it would be funny to send this photo to our adoption worker and to say that we are concerned about how quickly Ange-Laurette is aging! They were having fun dressing up at Grandma's, and Bruce took this hilarious photo of her. I especially like the go-go boots....that was one hot grandma in her day!!


The kids absolutely LOVE it at the farm. They love the freedom to roam, the decorated shed where they can finally play "house," and the outdoor fun with cousins and kitties. The night they returned from their 3-night stay there, Ange-Laurette called me into her room after being tucked in. She said, "I feel like I want to cry. I miss Grandma's house already." She has already decided that she is going to live there one day!

Pierre's first birthday party

I wish I could record Pierre's squeal! He turns into a little boy all over again each time he gets excited. Although we try to remind him of "4th grade behavior," it is a precious thing to watch him experience everything for the first time. As quickly as he learned to ride bike, he out grew his bike! That is what he wanted for his birthday: a new big bike and a fishing pole. At 5 feet tall now, he actually "fits" this new bike!


He invited his new friends and cool little brother to a backyard birthday pool party the weekend before school started. It was encouraging to see how he fit in, and it was a joy to see how he enjoyed every single aspect of the afternoon. From the "froggy" ice cream cake, to the timed sports obstacle course (which he easily won), to the bubbles and silly bands he handed out at the end...Pierre was in heaven! He must have thanked and hugged us a dozen times that night. (As you can see in the photo, Ange-Laurette is doing ok with the long wait until her December birthday :)

Summer tutoring success ~

Both Pierre and Ange-Laurette were blessed with this special lady, who offered them tutoring in reading all summer. We found the perfect program (LiPS) to help them both hear the sounds in words by focusing on speech sounds related to the formation of our lips/tongue/teeth...while segmenting those sounds and syllables to form words and sound them out. (Not sure I am explaining this correctly :) The point is that we had the best luck yet in helping Pierre finally focus on sounding out words, rather than guessing. Even more importantly, he LOVED the tutor and continued to work "like a dog," as he likes to put it. For Ange-Laurette, it was tolerable. :) Although she loves books like the Junie B series, she would much rather be out front playing 4-square. Pierre's "pursuit of excellence" is not something she has internalized just yet!


Still, her efforts in other areas are admirable. Ange-Laurette has simply never been taught the skills of being a good friend or of offering encouragement to others, etc. It is not that she is not kind. She just did not receive the coaching we offered our other kids from Day 1. After being with friends, she will still turn to me to ask, "Is THAT being nice, Mom?" She admits that her birthmother did not smile much. Ange-Laurette remembers that she did like babies and little children but says she did not greet or stop to talk with others very often. So many stories like these are surfacing.

As I braided her hair the other day, Ange told about the only time she visited her grandmother. She and her birthmother traveled "about 4 hours" by tap tap (taxi). They had to walk a long ways even once they arrived. Her older birth brother lived there with cousins. She remembers that they had lots of good water and trees to climb. Ange-Laurette's favorite memory was climbing trees for "co co ay" or coconuts. They would throw them down to the ground. If they would break open, all the cousins would run to drink from them. Then, the ladies would take "the inside white and mix it with rice and mmmmm, that was so good!"

Adoptions Finalized !!

The day before school started, we were able to finalize the adoptions in South Dakota. It was a quiet morning at our local court house, with a couple close friends and one of our adoption workers from Sioux Falls present. The judge smiled and commented on our bright colors and smiles...a much happier sight than most mornings! He quickly signed the paperwork as he shared that he had followed our story...."a great story." As we walked out, the kids noticed the single file of the NEXT lucky few to enter the courthouse. Ange-Laurette asked, "Why are those guys all dressed the same?" (in black and white stripes!) Pierre said, "Yeah, why are their hands tied together?" We said, "Let's just say that this morning is the ONLY time you probably want to visit the judge!"

We celebrated with breakfast at Perkins...and looked forward to the much bigger celebration at our house that weekend. The morning only made official what we already felt: these two precious children are definitely already our own. Although we ALWAYS value their past and the sacrifices of their birth families, we feel all the love and responsibility any other parent should. Mostly "love"!!

Top 10 Reasons... this was our Best Family Vacation Yet!

#10. We girls conquered our fears of heights on the aerial tramway and alpine slide
#9. We had a 3 bedroom cabin at Palmer Gulch (rather than our usual 6 to a room)
#8. Dane and Ashley were able to make the trip from Minneapolis and catch up on some heated wiffle ball

#7. We found the balance of large group, family, and alone time over 6 days
#6. The Lears finished strong in the beanbag tournament, dodging waterballoons launched from oversized slingshots
#5. The kids got to finally meet cousin Jack (huggable one-year-old!), my brother, and lots of new extended family...and they were completely themselves at this "over 6 month" point

#4. We got to visit Diana, the adoption coordinator that matched us with Pierre and Ange-Laurette. They amazed her with their English and encouraged her with their healthy happy smiles!
#3. The kids climbed rocks, swam in Sylvan Lake, went on a hayride, toured Mt. Rushmore, rode horses, and just plain enjoyed the beauty of the Black Hills

#2. Our awesome teenage daughter did not so much as roll her eyes :)
#1. No (carsick) ziplocs were needed for either 8-hour ride or the winding mountain roads!

Haitian Adoption Decrees granted!!

Soon after the earthquake, our adoption coordinator told us that she and the orphanage director in Port-au-Prince would continue to work to complete the kids' adoptions in Haiti, amidst the chaos there. It was important for all future Haitian adoptions that they try to follow all the legal steps there. However, we were asked to proceed, at the same time, by completing the adoptions here in South Dakota. Bruce and I assumed that we would never have all the original paperwork for our kids, and we highly doubted that the steps could be completed in Haiti, considering the state of Port-au-Prince. (although we were VERY grateful for their efforts)

Early June, we received an email from our adoption coordinator that we had to read three or four times to believe it. She had located both children's original paperwork in the orphanage director's office in Haiti. Not only that, but enclosed in their files were each child's Haitian Adoption Decrees! Somehow, amidst everything there, our cases had continued to go through the legal steps, with birthparent signatures and attorney signatures etc. On March 30, 2010, our kids had been legally pronounced our children with Lear as their last names. We now have the original paperwork in our hands: blue ink, tattered and torn, certified and stamped! It was the best piece of UPS mail we'd ever received!!!

By late September, we should be able to have the adoption completed here in South Dakota as well. (Just a formalization of what already is.) There will be a HUGE party like no other on that day. :) The kids are already planning all the details. We received notification today that our kids are now considered Category 1, which will help with citizenship issues later on.

We know that other families have not been as fortunate in locating their paperwork or even in receiving their adopted children yet. We pray daily for an end to their wait as well. There are still 8 children waiting in Pittsburgh, who have been linked to approved families with beds and loving homes waiting. Pray that the officials involved will speed up the process. These 8 kids need to start their new lives with their families, like ours were able to do.

Interview with Grandma Pat

Our cancelled trip with my mom to Haiti in January did not stop her from pursuing a trip to Haiti and finding a way to help the people there. Late May she spent over a week with Helping Hands to Haiti. They spent time in Port-au-Prince and a nearby village, delivering donations, discovering needs, and offering a Bible School. When she returned, the kids and I headed to Sioux Falls to help with a mission project at her church. The community had donated hundreds of bags of t-shirts that would be cut into strips and crocheted into mats for mothers and their children in Haiti. During the event, various adoptive parents shared their experiences. The kids were able to listen to me share a slideshow and tell their story. I was a little leary at first and told them they could wait in another room. I explained that parts of the story were kinda sad and new...and that people would all look at them as I shared details. Pierre smiled and said, "People always look. It's ok." Ange-Laurette added, "Oh, I've heard the story MANY times!" So, they were there and hanging on every word.


I was so touched by the dozens of people who just heard about the project from the newspaper and came over to work for a couple hours out of their Saturday. It just plain feels good to be able to do something so tangible for such a desperate people a world away. I am proud of my parents and their commitment to mission work, but especially for their heart for Haiti. They not only care...but they are DOING something so vital for this place and time.

Nearing that 6 month mark ~

The gap in between blog entries speaks for itself! :) Adjusting to a summer routine all home together, just as we were exiting the honeymoon period as a family of 6, was a bit trickier than we'd thought...but we made it through! There is not any specific thing we can place our finger on that made things so rough...nor is there one specific thing that can account for the tremendous positive changes in the past week or two. What we know for sure is that the nearing SIX MONTH milestone will be a celebrated one!!


We also now can see that true "callings" carry true "trials." Part of God's purpose in that must be the indescribeable blessings we are all now sensing. The exhaustion we (and the kids!) felt in the teaching and reteaching is resulting in two very social and well-adjusted kiddos. Their humor is evident throughout the day, as if they are not having to work so hard simply to communicate. They are confident and totally independent in play dates. Ange-Laurette had a swim party with 5 friends and could not have been distinguished without her swim cap and great "tan." :) Pierre was invited to lunch and miniature golf with 3 boys this afternoon. You should have seen his face light up as he hugged me, said "thank you," and ran off. The spats around the house are the ordinary ones you would expect with 3 elementary schoolers looking for something to do. We get a kick out of them saying they are bored....and that they are too hot outside (in South Dakota?)!


The sweetest moments are those where they just "get it." They imitate a type of sarcasm with a smile; they learn a new family card game; they leave a note on the frig saying "Best mom in the world"; they answer the phone and take a message; they give the thumbs up across the softball field or basketball court; they "drum" out the beat as they sing along to the printed words at church; they wait to see their first fireworks; and even when they just greet us in the morning saying, "Hmmmm, looks like a pretty good day out there today."


Pierre and I were talking about privileges here in America and it led to talking about why he thinks his birthmother and birthfather chose adoption for him. He said simply, "They wanted me to have enough food to eat." I was expecting all those other things I list when people are surprised to hear that our kids do have living birthparents who love them still in Haiti. But we will never understand it as well as Pierre and Ange-Laurette. Pierre went on to explain that his birthparents wanted him to be able to see a doctor now and go to school. Then he added, "Maybe they knew I'd have my fun little brother Nate." Somebody knew. God knew. And, although we have a long ways to go before we can see all the pieces put together like God already sees, I sure like the "picture" better each day now!

Thoughts to start summer...

What a whirl of a 3 months of school that was! The growth socially, academically, and emotionally for these two children (for the whole FAMILY actually) was truly dramatic. We try to stay focused on the progress they have made, rather than getting bummed about the huge gap that remains. Both Pierre and Ange-Laurette made over one year gain in the area of mathematics in 3 months. They adapted to most of the school rules and social norms. Still, they really struggle with the expectation that they sit quietly the majority of the day. I am sure they think we are half nuts with all our rules, coming from a life outdoors with over 50 kids for the past two years. Raising their hand before speaking was not exactly something they had been required to do. :) No one ever cared or noticed that Pierre was constantly rapping out a tune with his mouth noises...or that Ange-Laurette drummed out her excitement throughout the day. No one likely corrected them when they forcefully fought for their turn on the one set of monkey bars. No one heard that they were chewing with their mouths open or holding up their plate to their mouths to get the very last morsel. I can't imagine what Bruce and I sound like throughout the dinner hour or on the car rides. Why the need to be so quiet? Why such privacy? Why should we be courteous when we're frustrated with someone? The questions in their heads must go on and on.


We start summer with full mornings of tutoring, tennis, and basketball...and full evenings and weekends of baseball and softball. Still, we have much more laid-back time and much more time just together. They will spend hours playing four-square in the driveway or making up games on the trampoline. Friends call now and then for a bike ride to the park. The car rides to and from activities are great times to answer their questions and for them to share stories from their years in Haiti.


As stories surface among other families adopting kids from the same orphanage about tough conditions at the orphanage, we have chosen to not panic or overthink them. We knew from the beginning that adopting older children from Haiti would mean that they would have likely experienced trauma, before and after arriving at the orphanange. Even an orphanage exceeding world-wide standards is still an orphanage. The nannies (as loved as they were) were not trained or supervised. The other children they lived with came from equally traumatizing backgrounds. We knew that. We work hard to listen to the details our kids share without showing shock. We respond matter-of-factly that some things that were ok in Haiti are simply not ok here. We not only use it as a teaching time to share our values and expectations...but we use it as a time to reaffirm our commitment to them to keep them safe, fed, and loved. This keeps the door open for further conversations, and it avoids us judging their culture or second-guessing the love of their caretakers in Haiti.


I really, really encourage any other adoptive parents to do the same. As a psychologist, I believe that the best way to help them through any trauma they have experienced is by not creating more drama about it through questioning or overreacting. We help them share every detail they can remember now, so we can have information to help them later. Without condemning their past experiences, we reassure them of what their future will be like here: They will always have enough water and food; we will never hit them but will teach them right from wrong through positive discipline and instruction; and they can choose to have appropriate relationships with the opposite sex at each stage of life, with our help and the boundaries we set.


These two 9-year-olds have experienced hunger, abondonment, and harsh discipline... and have witnessed death, an earthquake, and more than one hurricane. We do not want to underestimate or be insensitive to the trauma some kids are still experiencing. We are just sharing that ours show very little trauma. We know that they have been prayed over by hundreds of you for months on end. We also know that Pierre and Ange-Laurette go to sleep believing whole-heartedly that this is their forever home...that they are forever safe...and that they are unconditionally loved. If only every child had that tonight.

Field trip to the zoo

I signed up to help chaperone the 3rd graders on their field trip to the local zoo. Both of my kids were in my small group, so I had the chance to watch them interact with their classmates. They ran to show others their favorite animals; remembered their quarters to feed the goats; and volunteered to be first to milk the new "pretend" cow.


It was a beautiful day and one to mark down, as likely my last "chaperoning" event. There will be few opportunities for volunteering with my new full-time status at work next year. But I decided that was ok. The day earlier I had hurried to the school to catch the last part of their school field day. I was reprimanded by my first grader who was embarrassed to have me show up. So, this new stage of independence for all three younger kids will be a welcome step for all of us. :)

"The way you make me feel"

Ange-Laurette learned two dance routines for her May recital: Michael Jackson's "The Way You Make Me Feel" and Madonna's "Vogue." Watching her up on stage with that bright smile after so much hard work was rejuvenating. It helped calm the stress of the end of the school year and start of summer.

To be honest, months 3-6 have been as tough as other adoptive parents have suggested they would be. The constancy of teaching and reteaching seems to have no end in sight....although we know there will be a day. Each new sport or vacation or other experience carries with it new rules and reminders. We are learning to treasure those quiet afternoons by our backyard pool where no words need to be spoken and their laughter fills the air. We forget to pray each morning for an extra helping of patience and gratitude. As well as Pierre and Ange-Laurette are adjusting, we simply forget the ocean of differences between their background, upbringing, and culture and ours. Pray that we keep this close to heart.

BRESMA Orphanage Rescue

The CBS clip from Pittsburgh

A tribute to their birthmothers

Mother's Day had that bittersweetness to it this year. All week I could not stop thinking about the kids' birthmothers. I will forever be in awe of the depth of their love for these kids ~ that they knew their only hope for a future would be in another family so far away. With the kids' improving English, they have been able to share cute stories and memories of their early years with their families. We get a better sense of their history and of their little personalities as they do that. Ange-Laurette told a story of a mean babysitter who her mom "fired" after Ange-Laurette tattled on her. Pierre told how he and his dad had bought his mom a special ceramic plate for a "Mother's Day" one year. The plate would be used only for special visitors to their home.

So, we tried to think of a way to honor these women on Mother's Day in a way that could become a tradition for years to come. After church, we took the kids to the florist. They each wrote a note to their birthmothers on a small card and rolled it up. They chose a helium balloon in their mom's favorite color and put the note inside. (Nate wanted to do the same for his great-grandma that has died.) Then, we went to the park....prayed thanks and praise over these women...and released the balloons. Unfortunately, the strong South Dakota winds immediatly carried them in the direction of Alaska...but that is ok!

That seemed to make the day all that it should be. I was able to enjoy them and their handmade gifts better after that. I cannot believe my fortune in being able to share their lives and be their new "Mom."

Road trips will never be the same :)

We traveled to Minneapolis to visit our oldest son and his wife. He works for a professional lacrosse team's sales department and had gotten us tickets to a game at the Excel Center. The first 90 minutes of our trip we had stopped all three small towns along the highway: one car sick child, two bathroom stops for upset stomachs, and one dime store stop for cortisone cream for some mosquito bite drama. It took us over 5 hours! BUT, no pouting, no fighting, no begging....just a regular traveling medical clinic. :)

We never get enough time with extended family in Pierre and Ange-Laurette's minds. We can tell what a significant role extended family played for the kids in Haitian culture. They expect them to be nearby and part of all of our activities. They ask about them and pray for each one at night...grandparents, especially. So much has changed in American families, with siblings and grandparents living so far apart. The relationships are just different. Even with all the technology to stay in touch, it just isn't the same as gathering together for meals and celebrations on a weekly basis. So, if you are one of the lucky ones who has your grandkids and extended family nearby...cherish that!

Third Grade Wax Museum

As part of their social studies unit, Pierre and Ange-Laurette had to pick an important person from history to depict. They wrote and memorized 6-7 facts on their person to share at a special night at the Redlin Art Museum. Pierre was my grandma's all-time favorite, Kirby Puckett. Ange-Laurette chose Mother Teresa, the name our older son calls me to be funny! It was fun to watch the faces of other parents as they pushed the kids' "buttons" to hear their lines. I think both kids impressed everyone with their improving English and poise. :)

First visit to Gma and Gpa's farm

We pointed out the white fence along the highway and then turned down the drive to Bruce's parents farm. We explained that their Grandpa Royal, who died just two years ago, had made that fence and loved this farm so much. Pierre and Ange-Laurette just kept looking past the white fence on both sides of the road as we crossed the bridge over a small creek. They said, "This is theirs? On both sides?" It was one of those 65 degree sunny days with hardly a breeze. They were beaming all day! They loved the tire swing, the playhouse, the 4-wheeler wagon ride, and searching the field for golfballs from the course across the highway. I so wished I could have been inside their minds for the day.

FUTBOL!!

18 months ago, Pierre was interviewed as he awaited a forever family in Haiti. Our adoption coordinator asked him what he wanted in a family. He answered that he wanted a family who would let him go to school, who would let him play soccer, and who would cook meat. So, last night was a dream come true for Pierre. He had his first soccer game. Pierre is a great ball handler but has never seen a game or learned the rules or positions. His coaches and teammates just let him go and treated him like any other player. At one point when Pierre was on defense but running the whole field, a teammate nicely called out, "Hey Pierre. Maybe try to stay behind the white line, ok?" Pierre played his heart out, kept his hands down, and made his very first goal! It was like watching his first steps.

Father-Daughter Dance

Soon after Ange-Laurette's arrival, she spotted this pinkest of pink dress. The sequins called to her from the aisle in the store! I remembered that our church has a Purity Ball for the fathers and daughters each spring. So, we have been waiting to wear this special dress for a long time! It was a precious thing....to unbead her hair and put it up into the tiara...and then to watch her face when she looked into the mirror. It was just like the first trip to Haiti when she saw a mirror for the first time on the hotel elevator. Priceless!

The way she and Bruce looked at each other was the next teary moment. We know that Ange-Laurette has grieved for years over her father's untimely death. He was a good father and loved her like any other father, tickling her and playing with her outside. Those are her memories. Now, she gets to be loved and protected by a new father who loves her at least as much! When she got home late that night, she simply said, "That was very, very good. It was very nice."

Back to work for Mom...

Where did those 12 weeks go?! It was just the right amount of time to make sure everyone was in the routine and ready for the next step. The kids love the after school program on the days I work, but they also love walking home and extra "outside" time on the days I don't. ANY time outside they love! They all pitched in to help Bruce assemble the trampoline. You could have heard the squeals and laughter blocks away when Ange-Laurette tried it out for the first time. It is one of the few things all three of them can do together, without one feeling left out. Every weekend we've got a few extra friends here, shooting hoops, playing foosball, riding bike, or jumping out back. Both Pierre and Ange-Laurette are riding bike now. The freedom they must feel to hop on and just ride!

I was sharing our story with a women's group at a friend's house. I was careful to emphasize two things: that God gets all credit and had his hand on every step...and that everyone has SOME "calling" that leads to HUGE blessing. After this much time, it was very emotional to recall the past year and a half. How it all began...how hard the waiting was...how devastating the news of the earthquake was...and now how amazingly well they are adjusting...and how much this just seems like the family we always had!

The gift of optometry

We had Ange-Laurette and Pierre's vision and hearing screened at school. Both passed the hearing but Ange-Laurette had 20/50 vision in one of her eyes. That night I told her that the nurse had called and said she could not see very well out of her right eye. Ange-Laurette said matter-of-factly, "Yes, this eye does not work." We told her that there are eye doctors that can prescribe glasses to help her see. You should have seen her face. She said, "Sunglasses?" She had no idea that the glasses people wear are not strictly for fashion or that there was a way to improve vision. Now that I think about it, I don't remember seeing anyone in glasses on the streets in Haiti. There are so many things we take for granted, especially related to our healthcare.

Yesterday, she had a thorough eye exam. When the doctor showed her what her vision would be like with glasses, Ange-Laurette yelled with a smile, "I can see! It is clean!" Even though Bruce encouraged me to have them remove all pink glasses from the shelves before Ange-Laurette started to try some on....she found a pink, glittery pair that is definitely "her." When she looked in the mirror she said, "I am beautiful." THAT she is!

The same morning she lost her first tooth here. At dinner, she and Pierre explained to us that, in Haiti, you throw your tooth over the house when you lose it. If you do this, a new white tooth will grow in its place. If you just throw the tooth on the ground, you will never grow in a new tooth there! (And they think OUR tooth fairy stories are silly!) I asked Ange-Laurette if she wanted to throw her tooth over the roof. She said, "No, me want the money." Beautiful....AND smart!

Celebrating 2 months "home"

We are also celebrating that spring is now here. If you block out the two foot snowdrifts and pile of boots by the door, you can almost hear the robins singing!! The kids have spent their entire lives outdoors in Haiti, so this has been a long wait. They were so excited to get out the bikes, scooters, sidewalk chalk, and jumpropes to play like they are used to. Nate set up t-ball in the backyard with frisbees as bases. Besides lifting the wrong knee when batting, they are hitting balls over the neighbors fence already. Pierre has mastered riding bike and asks to do so the second he arrives home from school each day. Bruce took Ange-Laurette on a little father-daughter date last night to pick out the pinkest/girliest bike they could find...princess helmet to boot! As hard as we try to steer her otherwise, she is eating up the chance to be a princess here. :)


Bailey and I had our first attempt at unbraiding Ange-Laurette's hair and then washing and brushing it in preparation for her appointment with our friend and stylist Carol. We helped the long process by buying the new "Princess and the Frog" DVD to watch as we worked. As always, I was disappointed by the need for such scary parts in a Disney movie, especially when they involved VooDoo and ghosts which are portrayed as so real to people in Haiti. I didn't do my homework in reviewing that one! Ange-Laurette was so patient with our 3 hours and then the next day with Carol's 2+ hours of rewashing, conditioning, and braiding. We are blessed to have someone so kind and talented right here in town! Ange-Laurette loved every minute of her pampering. Long awaited and well deserved.


The two-month-home anniversary was almost like an instant turning point with both kids. We have no more lengthy pouting spells with Pierre. He is able to talk through situations and understand our intent behind rules and correcting. We hear him telling himself, "that's ok" and "maybe later." He notices when he is treated younger than the other 3rd grade boys and does not like it. Even though Pierre tries to ask the other kids to stop things like tickling or chasing, he is not always successful. Overall, the other students have been awesome and accepting, but we are working with his teacher to help stop this "babying" of both kids. For Ange-Laurette, the two-month-mark meant so much more talking and laughing and being herself. She belly laughs about such appropriate things! There has not been any English vocabulary the past few days that either child did not appear to understand. They grab books and try to read them alone in the other room. Ange-Laurette even asked to have a sleepover in Bailey's bedroom downstairs...a first!


We were finally able to reach Pierre's birthmother by cell phone. She was thrilled that he had his chipped tooth repaired, and repeatedly shared that she was happy that he was safe and with a loving family. Pierre was switching between English and Creole as he spoke...Me go Biblioteka. His birthmother said to him, "You can't speak Creyole?" He corrected her and said that he and Ange-Laurette do speak Creole to each other. I felt bad for him because I think he was just excited and nervous. It must be hard to switch back and forth. Both kids also talked to their favorite nanny from the orphanage on the phone. They were disappointed when she said that Haiti is still "broken" and sometimes still "trembles." It was reminder to us to keep praying and to keep giving thanks that the kids are here!

Countless "WOW"s

Sensory overload for sure! I took the kids to the Mall of America while Bruce helped Dane and Ashley with moving. Between the indoor amusement park, number of stores, and mere variety of people, they were constantly just saying, "Wow. Wow, Mom." Everyone got to pick one thing. Guess who chose what?! A new American Girl doll in a pink dress, a set of miniature helmets, a new pair of beaded shoes, and a light-up sword. For growing up with so little, there is still an issue with their sense of "entitlement," as our adoption coordinator calls it. It is obvious that they did not hear what all of us did so often growing up, "What do you say? What do you tell them?" It can be frustrating but so understandable at the same time.


Pierre, Ange-Laurette, and Nate FINALLY got to swim at the motel. They have waited 7 weeks for the day. Hours upon hours of playing shark and counting sommersaults underwater. It brought back memories of being a little girl at the pool and calling out repeatedly, "Mom, watch!" As I watch them through each new experience, I always have this unseen backdrop of where they might have been otherwise...and I feel so super blessed to be part of this.