Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Simply HUGE!

I'm finding myself not as frustrated with the little I have accomplished this summer...because the progress of the kids the past two months has been astounding. June left us so scared about the road ahead with Ange-Laurette's "closed heart." We knew we were nearing those preteen years and wanted desperately to connect before then. What has happened since then brings a smile to Bruce and me everytime I get to retell a new story from the day.

There was a situation the other day where Ange-Laurette simply disregarded my suggestions at a social event and chose to be aloof and impolite instead. After me sharing my disappointment and reasons for my earlier requests, I noticed she was wiping her eyes and sniffling. We found a quiet place to talk. I asked if she was sad or mad. She answered genuinely, "I don't know." This had happened before, where she truly did not know why her eyes were watering and could not name the emotion. I gave her choices: Are you mad that I have too high of expectations? Are you sad that I was disappointed? Are you frustrated that it seems like you cannot please us? She thought for a long time and answered, "I think I am sad that you are not happy with me."


This may seem like a small thing to many parents, but HUGE for us here. I hugged her tight and did a happy dance! She smiled as I explained that this meant that her heart was really opening up some. She was beginning to see how her behaviors and attitude affected others...and more importantly, was CARING about those feelings of others.

Later yesterday in the car, Pierre said (pretty out of the blue), "When I have a wife someday, I want us to be just like you and Dad: working hard, kind, and doing fun stuff with my kids." Ange-Laurette piped in, "I want me and my (what do you call it...) husband to be like you and Dad, too." I smiled and said, "Really? Are you sure? Sometimes I am pretty strict? :) " She said, "But ya gotta be like that." Again...HUGE!

Finally, I was leaving for a hair appointment, and she called out, "Mom? Have fun at your appointment! And say hi to Carol for me." THIS was brand-new! What I had hoped she would grow to feel and learn by adolescence was happening in just one month. My cup runneth over!